Sunday, May 31, 2009

Peaceful Drive

As a surprise, Zane took me for a drive yesterday- to take pictures of wildflowers! I know sooooooo many people would be shocked to hear this... I took over 250. I love having the ability to capture a moment in time- whether it be a smile on a niece or nephew's face, a happy dance... or a single flower blowing in the wind.

I have a final project that I am doing for my design class- creating a collage of my pictures and arranging them in a way that is "properly" designed. I had been thinking about arranging pictures from Zane's deployment to Afghanistan, but have since changed my mind. I am going to make a collage of my pictures of nature. I have to bas the project around a single word, and the word I have chosen is serenity. For me, there is no place more serene than to be in nature- surrounded by God's beautiful creations! When I finish the project, I will put a picture on my blog- but for now, this is just a seed of an idea in my mind just starting to grow. I am really excited for the challenge!








I did want to share a few pictures from this weekend (of course) and some of the spectacular views I was witness to! I love how my heart feels when I can pause for a moment and reflect on every blessing I have in my life. I know I am truly blessed, and for that I am eternally grateful!

Sunday, May 24, 2009

Life Lessons

How do you react when a friend who is younger than you tells you he just purchased his wife's burial plot- she is dying of cancer. What do you do when you are with a friend who is allergic to nuts- and she unknowingly eats them and has a severe reaction- and you are the only one around? Or how about the police officer husband who is supposed to be home at 10:30 who doesn't return until 4 hours after that... having an "interesting night" playing cops and robbers? And what if all of this happened within 24 hours?!

I have had an incredibly peaceful weekend. Friday night, talking to my friend who will be burying his beautiful wife soon, I learned a great truth. I have never met her, but I know her spirit and her beauty. As we were talking, I was attempting to comfort him, and it was very difficult. I found myself crying with him- and that was an amazing experience. "...Mourn with those that mourn..."

My friend with the nut allergy? We left an event, came home and took care of her through allergy medication and rest. She kept telling me she could stay then go home an hour later... and I know that would have been a poor choice, as her airways were shutting off. I stayed home for concern there could be a more serious reaction "...comfort those that stand in need of comfort..."

And the cop husband? "...Stand as a witness of God in all times and in all things, and in all places..." He was arresting people and doing what is right , to keep the community a safer place to live. I felt in my heart that he was really ok... even though he was many hours late coming home. There was a peace that told me everything would be fine, and it was.

Alma 18:9 is a great scripture from the Book of Mormon- it's where all the quotes from above came from.

I am grateful for the experiences I had this weekend. There are moments when it is clear to me that Heavenly Father has had a hand in my life... and this is one of those moments. Through each of these experiences I have had a peace with me that is impossible to describe. I have been given words to say that I know are not my own. I have been guided in what to do. I have been watched over and blessed with peace. I am so grateful!

Sunday, May 17, 2009

The bus ride

For an emotional healing class I am taking right now, I am reading the book "The Dark Side of the Light Chasers" by Debbie Ford. The sub-title of the book is "Reclaiming your power, creativity, brilliance, and dreams". This book is absolutely incredible! I highly recommend it.



There is one chapter in particular that has really moved me to see myself more clearly. I feel like in order to fully understand the meaning there, you need to read all the previous chapters- so I won't tell you which one it is- but I want to share the ideas learned that have helped me see myself more clearly. I believe this meditation would help anyone.



Debbie talks in her book about the fact there are aspect of ourselves that we either don't like, or we try to ignore and set aside. I absolutely can see some of those aspects of myself- some of them clear as day. I know others can see them too. She suggests a meditation in which we can face those aspects, see what we can learn from them, and learn to accept the face that whether we like it or not, we have that particular trait within us... and we have the ability to embrace it rather than run from it.



She suggests doing a meditation- sitting in a quiet place and visualizing yourself getting on a bus. Sit somewhere near the middle as the bus begins its journey. The bus is full of people- old, young, thin, not-so-thin, beautiful, not-so-beautiful... all types of people. There may even be animals on the bus- let nothing come as a surprise there. As you look at the other passengers on the bus, you realize each of them is an aspect of you- who you are. Continuing the meditation, looking around, you see a passenger that would like to talk with you one-on-one. Imagine the bus stopping, and the 2 of you getting off, going somewhere to talk. That passenger will either have a name- or you can help them find a name- and you spend time finding out what it is that personality trait has taught you in your life. You then, once the conversation is complete, re-embark the bus with that passenger, and continue that journey. Doing the meditation more than once, you can learn many things from many other personality traits within you.



I recently did this visualization. I was astounded! The passenger who wanted to speak with me was Fat Freddie- a passenger who seemed larger than any of the people I have even seen compete on "The Biggest Loser". He was huge- and very sad. Our conversation was very interesting. I asked him, first of all why he was sad. The reason he told me was "Because you don't accept yourself how you are. It doesn't matter what you look like, although being healthy is much better for you than what I am like, I am sad that you hate yourself. I feel sad for you that you don't understand what a beautiful person you really are." Wow. He continued, "You have learned so much in your life. Part of the reason you have so much compassion for others is that you have had such a deep struggle within. It would be wonderful for you to accept yourself as you truly are, let your light shine, and stop beating yourself up over small choices you make." When he was done talking to me, we were at a park in my mind, I sat there and cried. He was right! We re-joined the other passengers on the bus. I embraced him, then left the bus to end the meditation. There are many other passengers waiting for their opportunity to do the same thing as Freddie.



Many people have known me for a long time. I have tried, unsuccessfully at times I am sure, to hide my insecurity over my weight. I also have allowed my weight at times to become an excuse as to why I was unable to participate in certain activities... and there are activities that my weight has caused me to not be able to participate in. I have the desire to no longer struggle with any of that. Today is a new day in my life!



Debbie says in her book "If we don't shift our perception of our true selves, we'll be stuck repeating our past behavior". Isn't that profound? By talking with the passengers on my personal bus journey, I am sure I will learn many new things about myself. I am excited for the bus ride!

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Blow Flowers






Yesterday I took my nephew to a field full of dandelion puffs. I explained to him they are flowers you blow- and now we have "Blow flowers!" We spent nearly an hour in that field blowing, running through, laying in... dandelion puffs. What better free entertainment could we have had?! Love those memories!!!

Thursday, May 7, 2009

Moab Sites!


Last week, Zane and I went to Moab with my brother and his family. I thought I would share a few of the incredible sights!

Oh, and of course, some of the cutest kids on the planet!



Our camp site was infested with caterpillars... there were thousands of them everywhere!They were making cocoons in the chairs, coolers, tires... we brought a few home as unexpected souveniers!


This poor little guy got sick on our first day there.

Kung Fu in the river... and 3 heart-shaped rocks were found that day!

Zane checking out his girlish figure!
We had a great time! I hope there will be more trips like this one in the future!